Vibe recently released an article entitled “The Mean Girls of Morehouse”. If you haven’t read it, here’s the link: Mean Girls.
The title alone was enough to warrant a response from President Franklin. Link here.
I’m not going to summarize the article or the response, because I have a lot to say, and it’s better that you read it for yourselves than take my recapitulation as fact.
I’m not here to talk about whether the Plastics are victims or not. I’m here to explain why their reasoning and their actions are fundamentally opposed to each other, and why this Vibe article is nothing but the bitter backlash of [wo]men scorned. And just to clarify, when i say “you” I mean those, and only those, presented in the article. I am referring to them as a group.
First and foremost, the Plastics knew what they were getting into when they came to Morehouse. One of the facets of Morehouse society that its reputation is contingent upon is the school’s image. A component of said image is the student attire. They told you when you applied. They told you during NSO. They told you every week in Crown Forum that you’re expected to dress a certain way here. What, you thought you were going to get here and they were going to say, “Oh. They’re different. They don’t have to dress that way”? …No. You signed up for this. You or your parents paid for this. You can’t come here and decide suddenly that you don’t want one small part of what you came here for. Morehouse is what it is because it excels both at portraying a certain image, & molding its students to do the same. You can’t expect to gain those benefits without first adhering to the image yourself.
You say the dress policy is not universally, or justly applied. That is a bold-faced lie. I have witnessed several occasions in which those who are wearing hats or du-rags have been addressed, and those wearing heels and skirts have been overlooked, likely because those in a position to say anything about it are either clueless as to what to say, or too eager to avoid seeming to be intolerable. Which is a large part of why the dress policy was enforced in the first place. No one knew how to deal, so they needed rules. But I digress.
You’ve heard of the Morehouse mystique. If not before attending the school, then during. What made you believe that dressing as a woman fulfilled that mystique? How many guest speakers came to us in women’s attire? How many of your brothers did you see sauntering in heels on Spirit Night? Not one of the many bow-tie workshops we were offered had a side session for those of the purse carrying persuasion. To quote my friend Dante Miles, “It is impossible for you to live up to the expectations of a Morehouse Man if you want to be a WOMAN..”
Now that we’ve established that you were in no way tricked, scammed, bamboozled, hoodwinked, swindled, or anything of that nature; that you knew very well that you’d be ostracized once you got here, lets talk about your reasons for leaving.
You claimed to aspire to be a leader in the same vein as our illustrious alum. There’s a fundamental issue with what you said, and what you’ve done. Because what you’ve done is fled. The previous leaders of Morehouse didn’t flee from the establishment when they were restricted. They fought against it. You claim to want to be like the Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr., but you can’t even stay in a homophobic school. King couldn’t go anywhere without persecution. King went to jail for fighting against that persecution. You went to another admissions office.
If they came at you with dogs, firehoses, jail, etc, would you fight? Or transfer? You’re not a leader. All they did was tell you to change your clothes.
There is a distinct difference between a leader, and an attention hungry person. There are also many similarities. Both tend to think, and act, in unconventional ways. Both are apparently in attendance at Morehouse. The discrepancy comes, however, in the person’s nature. Whether that person embraces fight or flight determines whether or not they are a leader. Again, you are not fighting. You are fleeing. And whining.
What were your intentions when you spoke to Vibe? To let people know of your existence and what you’ve been through? Or to ask people to assist you in standing against what you’ve endured? I’ve read the article several times. I’ve found no plea for help. Only self-indulgent cries. Why tell Vibe that you’ve considered suicide? Morehouse hasn’t encouraged that in any way. Your suicidal notions are, again, a means of fleeing. And if you disagree, tell me. Which one of the alum that you wish to be like has committed suicide?
Yes, many of our alum’s actions were done for the sake of attention. But that attention served a higher purpose: the liberty and just treatment of a people. Your actions call for attention, yet ask for no resolution. You claim to want change, but are unwilling to facilitate it. I’m curious to know if you were one of those who participated in the sit-ins at Woodruff library my freshman year, or if you merely complained about it and fled to Douglass, or your room. I’m inclined to believe the latter. But again, I digress.
“I don’t know why a Morehouse man can’t become a woman.” The answer is quite simple. You are not a Morehouse Man until you graduate, which you have yet to do. You are a man of Morehouse who at one time aspired to be a Morehouse Man. To be a Morehouse Man is to reach the apex of the Morehouse matriculation experience. It is to embrace the Morehouse mystique in some way. It is to be a leader. Which, again, you are not. A Morehouse Man could, arguably, become a woman. But you are not a Morehouse Man.
I have no qualms with accepting your claims of wanting to change the world. But the ways in which you have gone about it are not indicative of that claim. In fact, you merely contributed to the detriment of an institution that has produced leaders you profess to admire. You are aiding and abetting the image of black men that those leaders fought so hard against. And, moreover, you’ve only made homophobia an even more pressing issue at Morehouse. What have you solved?! What have you done, besides initialize your own means of indulging in your own desires under the guise of righteous anger?!
If you want to make a change, work on altering the issues of gender expectations in our country. Make an effort to alter the ways in which our communities expect men to conduct themselves. But do not assert that you are fighting for change when in fact you ran from an ideal opportunity. Do not pick an easy target like Morehouse, which is already conservative as far as the make up of its student body goes, and then run away and complain to the press about the establishment that you did nothing to alter.
You say that Morehouse was not ready for you. Quite the contrary, my brothers. You were not ready for Morehouse.
--Silenthate. Lovescreams.
Pretty much. Well said. That is all.
12.10.10
10.10.10
OMGosh!
Ok, so I'm watching Behind The Music: Jennifer Hudson
{I luh dat gurl. If I could pull an Ursula & take her voice...I'd be PAID}
& I just found out we have the same birthday!
{Sept. 12}
That is TOTALLY WICKED!!
^_^
teehee. tis all
Teared up towards the end though. Smh. Unfathomable what happened to her family. Through it all, she's still so radiant.
6.10.10
Like What You See?
Then get it!
It appears Serena Williams is wearing this cute little ribbed dress number from Forever21:
Snag it while you can, it's only $24.80! {click on picture to purchase}
5.10.10
23.9.10
The Black Ivy
The Black Ivy serves as a tribute to the first black colleges that paved the way for our generation and created a common ground for hardworking, likeminded individuals. What the original Black Ivy league did for folks many years ago is what we strive to do today with individuals that inspire, motivate and spark the creativity of beings around them. --Street Etiquette
The Black Ivy from Street Etiquette on Vimeo.
"...and I'm talking about a league of extraordinary gents, to represent the roots of Howard, Morehouse, Spelman to present a spellbinding, riveting, visual display [as we] reintroduce the defined, cultured, male."
Certified dope.
20 THINGS I WISH I’D KNOWN AT 20
(mightygirl.com)
1. Consider the source. If you’re worried about someone who dislikes you, first ask yourself whether they’re an asshole. If you don’t like them, and they don’t like you, that’s not a problem. That’s a mutual understanding.
2. Get off the couch. If you find yourself playing hard to get, don’t pretend to be busy. Just be busy.
3. Don’t waste your time. If you have to play hard to get, move on. You’ll know when you’ve found a healthy relationship because it won’t confuse you.
4. When in doubt, shut up. Silence is a smart negotiation tactic, the best option when you’re processing how to respond, and always more productive than lying about what you’re thinking.
5. Don’t complain. Maybe venting makes you feel better, but letting off steam can also lull you into maintaining the status quo. Unfortunately, the status quo is pissing you off, which is why you’re whining in the first place. If you’re frustrated, turn that energy toward fixing your problems, not bitching about them.
6. Don’t obsess. Worrying is complaint’s ugly cousin. Either use that energy to change your situation, or relax.
7. Find an age-appropriate style. No one wants to see a 20 year old in beige slacks and a wool blazer. Buy trendy clothes, wear the slutty dress, do something ugly with your hair. Be part of your generation, so you can laugh at the photos later. {unless beige slacks & a wool blazer's yo thing; then so be it!}
8. Be polite. It keeps doors open, lessens the potential for misunderstandings, and increases the odds of getting invited back to the beach house.
9. But defend your boundaries. When someone isn’t taking no for an answer, clarify what you want, and then respond forcefully. Being polite to someone who isn’t hearing you is naive.
10. You look good {why, thank you ;-)}. There’s no such thing as the hottest person in the room. Everyone is attracted to something different, so just take those odds and run with them.
11. Being nice is overrated. In fact, “nice” is the least interesting thing someone can say about you.
12. Keep it to yourself. “She seems nice” is an excellent thing to say about someone you don’t like. Particularly in the company of people you don’t know.
13. Know your audience. When you’re telling a story and someone interrupts you, let them.
14. Let your passion shape your profession. You know that thing your dad says? “If work wasn’t hard, they wouldn’t pay you to do it.” Please. There are professional rock stars, astronauts, puppy trainers, and bloggers.
15. Sex is personal. Don’t bother with one-night stands if they’re not your thing, and don’t judge people for enjoying them (or not). Waiting to sleep with someone doesn’t make you an uptight prude, and jumping into bed doesn’t make you a spontaneous adventure seeker.
16. Focus. The saying, “what you’re thinking about is what you’re becoming” isn’t just chilling, it’s a universal law. Be aware of how you’re investing your attention – including your words, and your actions.
17. Cut yourself a break. Don’t offer a running commentary on your own faults. When you do, the people around you listen. Give yourself space to change your character.
18. Don’t be intimidated. World travelers are just people who bought plane tickets. Pulitzer Prize winners are people who sit alone and write. You can break the most profound accomplishment down to a series of mundane tasks.
19. Choose good company. Ask yourself if a person makes you better or drains your life force. If the answer is B, you’re busy next time they call. And the time after that.
20. Enjoy your body. Odds are you’re more beautiful now than you will be again. Ask your roommate. o.O
{via}
1. Consider the source. If you’re worried about someone who dislikes you, first ask yourself whether they’re an asshole. If you don’t like them, and they don’t like you, that’s not a problem. That’s a mutual understanding.
2. Get off the couch. If you find yourself playing hard to get, don’t pretend to be busy. Just be busy.
3. Don’t waste your time. If you have to play hard to get, move on. You’ll know when you’ve found a healthy relationship because it won’t confuse you.
4. When in doubt, shut up. Silence is a smart negotiation tactic, the best option when you’re processing how to respond, and always more productive than lying about what you’re thinking.
5. Don’t complain. Maybe venting makes you feel better, but letting off steam can also lull you into maintaining the status quo. Unfortunately, the status quo is pissing you off, which is why you’re whining in the first place. If you’re frustrated, turn that energy toward fixing your problems, not bitching about them.
6. Don’t obsess. Worrying is complaint’s ugly cousin. Either use that energy to change your situation, or relax.
7. Find an age-appropriate style. No one wants to see a 20 year old in beige slacks and a wool blazer. Buy trendy clothes, wear the slutty dress, do something ugly with your hair. Be part of your generation, so you can laugh at the photos later. {unless beige slacks & a wool blazer's yo thing; then so be it!}
8. Be polite. It keeps doors open, lessens the potential for misunderstandings, and increases the odds of getting invited back to the beach house.
9. But defend your boundaries. When someone isn’t taking no for an answer, clarify what you want, and then respond forcefully. Being polite to someone who isn’t hearing you is naive.
10. You look good {why, thank you ;-)}. There’s no such thing as the hottest person in the room. Everyone is attracted to something different, so just take those odds and run with them.
11. Being nice is overrated. In fact, “nice” is the least interesting thing someone can say about you.
12. Keep it to yourself. “She seems nice” is an excellent thing to say about someone you don’t like. Particularly in the company of people you don’t know.
13. Know your audience. When you’re telling a story and someone interrupts you, let them.
14. Let your passion shape your profession. You know that thing your dad says? “If work wasn’t hard, they wouldn’t pay you to do it.” Please. There are professional rock stars, astronauts, puppy trainers, and bloggers.
15. Sex is personal. Don’t bother with one-night stands if they’re not your thing, and don’t judge people for enjoying them (or not). Waiting to sleep with someone doesn’t make you an uptight prude, and jumping into bed doesn’t make you a spontaneous adventure seeker.
16. Focus. The saying, “what you’re thinking about is what you’re becoming” isn’t just chilling, it’s a universal law. Be aware of how you’re investing your attention – including your words, and your actions.
17. Cut yourself a break. Don’t offer a running commentary on your own faults. When you do, the people around you listen. Give yourself space to change your character.
18. Don’t be intimidated. World travelers are just people who bought plane tickets. Pulitzer Prize winners are people who sit alone and write. You can break the most profound accomplishment down to a series of mundane tasks.
19. Choose good company. Ask yourself if a person makes you better or drains your life force. If the answer is B, you’re busy next time they call. And the time after that.
20. Enjoy your body. Odds are you’re more beautiful now than you will be again. Ask your roommate. o.O
{via}
14.9.10
Words That Don't Exist in the English Language
L’esprit de escalier: (French) The feeling you get after leaving a conversation, when you think of all the things you should have said. Translated it means “the spirit of the staircase.”
Waldeinsamkeit: (German) The feeling of being alone in the woods.
Meraki: (Greek) Doing something with soul, creativity, or love.
Forelsket: (Norwegian) The euphoria you experience when you are first falling in love.
Gheegle: (Filipino) The urge to pinch or squeeze something that is unbearably cute.
Pochemuchka: (Russian) A person who asks a lot of questions.
Pena ajena: (Mexican Spanish) The embarrassment you feel watching someone else’s humiliation.
Cualacino: (Italian) The mark left on a table by a cold glass.
Ilunga: (Tshiluba, Congo) A person who is ready to forgive any abuse for the first time, to tolerate it a second time, but never a third time.
{via}
Waldeinsamkeit: (German) The feeling of being alone in the woods.
Meraki: (Greek) Doing something with soul, creativity, or love.
Forelsket: (Norwegian) The euphoria you experience when you are first falling in love.
Gheegle: (Filipino) The urge to pinch or squeeze something that is unbearably cute.
Pochemuchka: (Russian) A person who asks a lot of questions.
Pena ajena: (Mexican Spanish) The embarrassment you feel watching someone else’s humiliation.
Cualacino: (Italian) The mark left on a table by a cold glass.
Ilunga: (Tshiluba, Congo) A person who is ready to forgive any abuse for the first time, to tolerate it a second time, but never a third time.
{via}
13.9.10
Forever Young
I turned 20 yesterday.
My friends threw me a suprise party.
I LOVE THEM!
^_^
I want to be forever young.
this is my #100th post! *does jigg*
19.8.10
18.8.10
17.8.10
30 Most Satisfying Simple Pleasures
1. Sleeping In on a Rainy Day – As the rain beats lightly against the window, you nestle your head deeper into your pillow. The sound is soothing and your bed feels like a sanctuary. There is no place you would rather be.
2. Finding Money You Didn’t Know You Had – You reach into your pocket and find a $20 bill from the last time you wore these jeans. You aren’t rich, but you are richer than you were a second earlier.
3. Making Brief Eye Contact with Someone of the Opposite Sex – You pass him/her on the street or in the subway. He/she glances up at you momentarily, making direct eye contact in a way that seems to communicate a subtle curiosity. For a split second it makes you think… and then it’s gone.
4. Skinny Dipping – There is something mysteriously liberating about being naked in a body of water. You are naked, but it feels natural, a sense of unrefined freedom.
5. Receiving a Real Letter or Package via Snail Mail – E-mail has become the primary source of written communication. Most snail mail these days is junk mail. When you check the mail and find a real letter or package from someone you know, excitement overtakes you as you tear into this rare gift.
6. Making the Yellow Light - It’s one of the most common simple pleasures, the act of beating the pack. As you blaze through the yellow light you glance in your rearview to see all the cars behind you stopping at the red light. Yes! You made it!
7. Telling a Funny or Interesting, True Story - One of the most enticing roles you lead in life is that of the storyteller. You love to share stories, especially those that will captivate your audience with deep curiosity and humor. There are few things more satisfying than telling a true story that others enjoy listening to.
8. Seeing a Friend Stumble Over Himself – As you walk across the street with your friend, he fails to accurately address the curb on the other side. He trips and stumbles around momentarily before regaining his footing, then swiftly attempts to play it off like nothing happened. This can be a hilarious sight if the moment is right.
9. Hearing the Right Song at the Right Moment - It doesn’t matter what the setting is, hearing the right song for that moment is one of those simple pleasures in life that instantly lifts your spirits. You could be driving home from work, hanging out at a bar with friends, or jogging. When the right song rattles your ear drums the entire meaning of life seems crystal clear.
10. The First Sip of a Beverage When You’re Thirsty – You just finished mowing the lawn or taking a long jog. The only thing on your mind is an ice-cold glass of water. When you are really, really thirsty, that first sip of any liquid beverage is sheer bliss.
11. Catching a Glimpse of Bare Skin on the Opposite Sex – For guys, it’s when the waitress bends over a little too far. For girls it’s seeing that buff guy in a Speedo. Either way, when you see a bit more skin than you were expecting on the opposite sex, you can’t help but to smirk on the inside.
12. Saying the Same Thing Simultaneously – There is a moment of silence. Then all of the sudden you and your friend blurt out the same exact set of words simultaneously. This rare occurrence is something to smile about.
13. The Pull-Through Parking Spot – You pull into a parking spot and are delighted to see the availability of the parking spot immediately in front of you. You pull through to the spot in front so that when you return to the car you can drive forward out of the parking spot. Why? Because driving backwards is a pain in the butt.
14. Realizing You Have More Time to Sleep – Something abruptly awakens you and you think it’s time to get up. Then you squint over at your alarm clock and realize you still have 2 more hours to sleep. A warm euphoric feeling shoots though your body as you glide gracefully back to your dreams.
15. People Watching – Sitting there on your bench you can see people in every direction. Tall people, small people, thin and plump. Blond, brunette, and redhead alike. Each of them has a different stride and a unique expression. As you drift from body to body you are mesmerized by what you see.
16. Putting On Clothes Straight from the Dryer – As soon as the dryer buzzes, you pull out your clothes and put them on. They feel soothingly warm on your skin and emit a fresh-scented aroma into the air. A sentiment of ease comes over you as you head out to conquer the day.
17. A Familiar Smell – You just pulled into your parent’s driveway and opened the car door. You haven’t been home in a long while. You smell familiarity in the air, the scent of a large pine tree in the neighbor’s yard. As you head through the front door, more familiar smells consume your senses. Gosh, it feels good to be home…
18.The Feeling You Get When Your Idea Works – You have been struggling to resolve a complex problem all day and you just can’t seem to get it right. Filled with frustration, you decide to exercise one last idea before calling it a night. You’ve had many ideas before that failed miserably… but this time it works.
19. Fresh, Clean Bed Sheets – You yank at the corner of the bedspread to create just enough space to slide your body under the freshly cleaned sheets. The sheets feel cool to the touch. Everything seems so clean, like nobody has ever slept in this bed before.
20. A Beautiful View – As the car veers around the side of the mountain you gaze out the passenger window. It’s a clear, sunny day and you can see the entire valley below filled with wild flowers and bright green vegetation. The scenery reminds you of something you once saw in National Geographic. But here it is live, right before your eyes.
21. Reminiscing About Old Times with Your Closest Friends – Pink Floyd once said “the memories of a man in his old age are the deeds of a man in his prime”. There is no simple pleasure more satisfying than recounting the greatest moments of your life with your closest friends who lived these moments alongside you.
22. Receiving an Unexpected Compliment – It’s been an average day. Nothing really great has happened, but nothing terrible occurred either. This monotonous day has put you in a dreary mood. Unexpectedly, an older, attractive lady taps you on the shoulder, calls you “handsome” and says she loves your shirt. The day just got a whole lot better.
23. Having a Good Laugh – Laughter is the greatest cure of all. Life is extraordinary in the moments when you are laughing so hard you can barely breathe. These moments of deep laughter are divine in the sense that they cleanse your mood and set your mind on a positive track.
24. The Feeling After a Healthy Workout - It’s a giddy feeling of self accomplishment; the one true activity that actually makes you feel better and look better simultaneously. When you walk out the front door of the gym you are on top of the world.
25. The Celebration in the Instant Something Makes Sense – Even now that it has explained to you for the third time, you just don’t understand how it works. Everyone else seems to understand but you. Then out of the blue the dots connect in your mind. You finally get it, and it feels great!
26. Relaxing Outdoors on a Sunny Day – As you relax sprawled out in a lawn chair, the sun warms your skin and a light breeze keeps the temperature comfortable. Birds are chirping merrily in the trees behind you. You are at complete peace with the environment.
27. Holding Hands with Someone You Love – Every time she grabs your hand you are overcome with an awareness of how much she means to you. Holding hands is sensual and physically intimate, yet subtle. There are few people you allow to hold your hand, so when it happens you can be sure that the moment is special.
28. Playing in the Water – Water marvels people of all ages. From jumping in puddles as a child, to doing cannon balls in the pool as an adolescent, to enjoying a cocktail in the Jacuzzi as an adult… water is enjoyable.
29. Making Someone Smile – You notice that your colleague has been under a great deal of stress with meeting a deadline, so you take it upon yourself to complete one of her indirect responsibilities for her. As soon as she realizes what you did, she comes into your office with a big smile on her face. “Thank you”, she says. You just hit two birds with one stone, because making her smile just made your day.
30. Finishing What You Started – You just finished up a big project you’ve been working on for the last few months, or maybe you just finished your first marathon… Either way, you finalized what you set out to accomplish. The feeling of self accomplishment you get when you finish what you started is by far one of the most rewarding simple pleasures life has to offer.
{via}
2. Finding Money You Didn’t Know You Had – You reach into your pocket and find a $20 bill from the last time you wore these jeans. You aren’t rich, but you are richer than you were a second earlier.
3. Making Brief Eye Contact with Someone of the Opposite Sex – You pass him/her on the street or in the subway. He/she glances up at you momentarily, making direct eye contact in a way that seems to communicate a subtle curiosity. For a split second it makes you think… and then it’s gone.
4. Skinny Dipping – There is something mysteriously liberating about being naked in a body of water. You are naked, but it feels natural, a sense of unrefined freedom.
5. Receiving a Real Letter or Package via Snail Mail – E-mail has become the primary source of written communication. Most snail mail these days is junk mail. When you check the mail and find a real letter or package from someone you know, excitement overtakes you as you tear into this rare gift.
6. Making the Yellow Light - It’s one of the most common simple pleasures, the act of beating the pack. As you blaze through the yellow light you glance in your rearview to see all the cars behind you stopping at the red light. Yes! You made it!
7. Telling a Funny or Interesting, True Story - One of the most enticing roles you lead in life is that of the storyteller. You love to share stories, especially those that will captivate your audience with deep curiosity and humor. There are few things more satisfying than telling a true story that others enjoy listening to.
8. Seeing a Friend Stumble Over Himself – As you walk across the street with your friend, he fails to accurately address the curb on the other side. He trips and stumbles around momentarily before regaining his footing, then swiftly attempts to play it off like nothing happened. This can be a hilarious sight if the moment is right.
9. Hearing the Right Song at the Right Moment - It doesn’t matter what the setting is, hearing the right song for that moment is one of those simple pleasures in life that instantly lifts your spirits. You could be driving home from work, hanging out at a bar with friends, or jogging. When the right song rattles your ear drums the entire meaning of life seems crystal clear.
10. The First Sip of a Beverage When You’re Thirsty – You just finished mowing the lawn or taking a long jog. The only thing on your mind is an ice-cold glass of water. When you are really, really thirsty, that first sip of any liquid beverage is sheer bliss.
11. Catching a Glimpse of Bare Skin on the Opposite Sex – For guys, it’s when the waitress bends over a little too far. For girls it’s seeing that buff guy in a Speedo. Either way, when you see a bit more skin than you were expecting on the opposite sex, you can’t help but to smirk on the inside.
12. Saying the Same Thing Simultaneously – There is a moment of silence. Then all of the sudden you and your friend blurt out the same exact set of words simultaneously. This rare occurrence is something to smile about.
13. The Pull-Through Parking Spot – You pull into a parking spot and are delighted to see the availability of the parking spot immediately in front of you. You pull through to the spot in front so that when you return to the car you can drive forward out of the parking spot. Why? Because driving backwards is a pain in the butt.
14. Realizing You Have More Time to Sleep – Something abruptly awakens you and you think it’s time to get up. Then you squint over at your alarm clock and realize you still have 2 more hours to sleep. A warm euphoric feeling shoots though your body as you glide gracefully back to your dreams.
15. People Watching – Sitting there on your bench you can see people in every direction. Tall people, small people, thin and plump. Blond, brunette, and redhead alike. Each of them has a different stride and a unique expression. As you drift from body to body you are mesmerized by what you see.
16. Putting On Clothes Straight from the Dryer – As soon as the dryer buzzes, you pull out your clothes and put them on. They feel soothingly warm on your skin and emit a fresh-scented aroma into the air. A sentiment of ease comes over you as you head out to conquer the day.
17. A Familiar Smell – You just pulled into your parent’s driveway and opened the car door. You haven’t been home in a long while. You smell familiarity in the air, the scent of a large pine tree in the neighbor’s yard. As you head through the front door, more familiar smells consume your senses. Gosh, it feels good to be home…
18.The Feeling You Get When Your Idea Works – You have been struggling to resolve a complex problem all day and you just can’t seem to get it right. Filled with frustration, you decide to exercise one last idea before calling it a night. You’ve had many ideas before that failed miserably… but this time it works.
19. Fresh, Clean Bed Sheets – You yank at the corner of the bedspread to create just enough space to slide your body under the freshly cleaned sheets. The sheets feel cool to the touch. Everything seems so clean, like nobody has ever slept in this bed before.
20. A Beautiful View – As the car veers around the side of the mountain you gaze out the passenger window. It’s a clear, sunny day and you can see the entire valley below filled with wild flowers and bright green vegetation. The scenery reminds you of something you once saw in National Geographic. But here it is live, right before your eyes.
21. Reminiscing About Old Times with Your Closest Friends – Pink Floyd once said “the memories of a man in his old age are the deeds of a man in his prime”. There is no simple pleasure more satisfying than recounting the greatest moments of your life with your closest friends who lived these moments alongside you.
22. Receiving an Unexpected Compliment – It’s been an average day. Nothing really great has happened, but nothing terrible occurred either. This monotonous day has put you in a dreary mood. Unexpectedly, an older, attractive lady taps you on the shoulder, calls you “handsome” and says she loves your shirt. The day just got a whole lot better.
23. Having a Good Laugh – Laughter is the greatest cure of all. Life is extraordinary in the moments when you are laughing so hard you can barely breathe. These moments of deep laughter are divine in the sense that they cleanse your mood and set your mind on a positive track.
24. The Feeling After a Healthy Workout - It’s a giddy feeling of self accomplishment; the one true activity that actually makes you feel better and look better simultaneously. When you walk out the front door of the gym you are on top of the world.
25. The Celebration in the Instant Something Makes Sense – Even now that it has explained to you for the third time, you just don’t understand how it works. Everyone else seems to understand but you. Then out of the blue the dots connect in your mind. You finally get it, and it feels great!
26. Relaxing Outdoors on a Sunny Day – As you relax sprawled out in a lawn chair, the sun warms your skin and a light breeze keeps the temperature comfortable. Birds are chirping merrily in the trees behind you. You are at complete peace with the environment.
27. Holding Hands with Someone You Love – Every time she grabs your hand you are overcome with an awareness of how much she means to you. Holding hands is sensual and physically intimate, yet subtle. There are few people you allow to hold your hand, so when it happens you can be sure that the moment is special.
28. Playing in the Water – Water marvels people of all ages. From jumping in puddles as a child, to doing cannon balls in the pool as an adolescent, to enjoying a cocktail in the Jacuzzi as an adult… water is enjoyable.
29. Making Someone Smile – You notice that your colleague has been under a great deal of stress with meeting a deadline, so you take it upon yourself to complete one of her indirect responsibilities for her. As soon as she realizes what you did, she comes into your office with a big smile on her face. “Thank you”, she says. You just hit two birds with one stone, because making her smile just made your day.
30. Finishing What You Started – You just finished up a big project you’ve been working on for the last few months, or maybe you just finished your first marathon… Either way, you finalized what you set out to accomplish. The feeling of self accomplishment you get when you finish what you started is by far one of the most rewarding simple pleasures life has to offer.
{via}
Judge Not
I was shocked, confused, bewildered
As I entered Heaven's door,Not by the beauty of it all,
Nor the lights or its decor.
But it was the folks in Heaven
Who made me sputter and gasped
The thieves, the liars, the sinners,The alcoholics and the trash.
There stood the kid from seventh grade
Who swiped my lunch money twice.
Next to him was my old neighbor Who never said anything nice.
Herb, who I always thought Was rotting away in hell, Was sitting pretty on cloud nine,
Looking incredibly well.
Inudged Jesus, 'What's the deal? I would love to hear Your take.
How'd all these sinners get up here? God must've made a mistake.
'And why's everyone so quiet, So somber - give me a clue.'
'Hush, child,' He said, 'they're all in shock. No one thought they'd be seeing you.'
JUDGE NOT.
Remember...Just going to church doesn't make you a Christian
any more than standing in your garage makes you a car ..
Every saint has a PAST...
Every sinner has a FUTURE!
{via}
As I entered Heaven's door,Not by the beauty of it all,
Nor the lights or its decor.
But it was the folks in Heaven
Who made me sputter and gasped
The thieves, the liars, the sinners,The alcoholics and the trash.
There stood the kid from seventh grade
Who swiped my lunch money twice.
Next to him was my old neighbor Who never said anything nice.
Herb, who I always thought Was rotting away in hell, Was sitting pretty on cloud nine,
Looking incredibly well.
Inudged Jesus, 'What's the deal? I would love to hear Your take.
How'd all these sinners get up here? God must've made a mistake.
'And why's everyone so quiet, So somber - give me a clue.'
'Hush, child,' He said, 'they're all in shock. No one thought they'd be seeing you.'
JUDGE NOT.
Remember...Just going to church doesn't make you a Christian
any more than standing in your garage makes you a car ..
Every saint has a PAST...
Every sinner has a FUTURE!
{via}
1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch!
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.
8. It’s OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.
12. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don’t worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words “In five years, will this matter?”
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn’t do.
35. Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative — dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come.
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift.
--Regina Brett, 90 years old {via}
{I'm having one of those borrwing moments again. You know the deal, it's calling my name! To Originally fron NY, I apologize and thank you in adance! 0:-) }
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch!
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.
8. It’s OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.
12. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don’t worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words “In five years, will this matter?”
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn’t do.
35. Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative — dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come.
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift.
--Regina Brett, 90 years old {via}
{I'm having one of those borrwing moments again. You know the deal, it's calling my name! To Originally fron NY, I apologize and thank you in adance! 0:-) }
"The concept of physical beauty as a virtue is one of the dumbest, most pernicious and destructive ideas of the western world, and we should have nothing to do with it.” Black is Beautiful is a “white idea turned inside out…Concentrating on whether we are beautiful is a way of measuring worth that is wholly trivial... and preoccupation with it is an irrevocable slavery of the senses.” --Toni Morrison
16.8.10
10.8.10
The Colour of Beauty
"She has to be a white girl dipped in chocolate."
"Fashion's stuck in 1955 and I don't know what it's going to take for them to move forward."
"...and unfortunately it worked...Everyone's saying 'well remember that one black issue we got?' Gimme a break."
{via}
Choppa Style
From my siblings & close friends to celebrity big names--it seems like everyone is chopping their hair off!
Solange Knowles {probably the one who caught the most flack for it :( }
Chrisette Michele
Brittany "Bre" Scullark {from America's Next Top Model Cycle 5}
Janet Jackson
And the newest member of the No Hair Don't Care Group: Emma Watson {Hermione Granger from the Harry Potter movies}
Solange Knowles {probably the one who caught the most flack for it :( }
Chrisette Michele
Brittany "Bre" Scullark {from America's Next Top Model Cycle 5}
Janet Jackson
And the newest member of the No Hair Don't Care Group: Emma Watson {Hermione Granger from the Harry Potter movies}
My Queen and Natural Heir
Not to knock weave but I have my preference
This natural hair possesses such an essence
The way it’s meant to be. Growth from Adolescence
An expression; unique, be you no pressure
Personality shown throughout the texture
Grow into the style that last forever
Straight, loc-ed, curly, braided or bald
Wake up what to do? Problem solved
Styled simply yet appears so intricately involved
Naturally yours from root to end
No receipt, cant take it back or share with a friend
No glue no burns, chasing a trend
a wig? a bang? nikki minaj?
Naturally you, self-Identified
let me play in it, scalp massage
Pullin on tracks? “no you cant”
Soft to the touch, a visual stimulant
I love it, that’s a fact
Your natural look is my AFROdisiac
~Jirbaud
This natural hair possesses such an essence
The way it’s meant to be. Growth from Adolescence
An expression; unique, be you no pressure
Personality shown throughout the texture
Grow into the style that last forever
Straight, loc-ed, curly, braided or bald
Wake up what to do? Problem solved
Styled simply yet appears so intricately involved
Naturally yours from root to end
No receipt, cant take it back or share with a friend
No glue no burns, chasing a trend
a wig? a bang? nikki minaj?
Naturally you, self-Identified
let me play in it, scalp massage
Pullin on tracks? “no you cant”
Soft to the touch, a visual stimulant
I love it, that’s a fact
Your natural look is my AFROdisiac
~Jirbaud
Yo Quiero un Clutcho Enorme
I want a big clutch! Like the ones in these pics:
I'm officially on the hunt.
{via Chic Therapy & The Fashion Bomb}
Okay, the last one's not necessarily a clutch. But its got a big bow! Couldn't resist. Check her out at Paris Most Wanted
9.8.10
Contemplating "Venting"
Can we do each other a favor and not minimize things by calling it "venting" when POCs (hell, let's just be honest - Black people, especially us Angry Black Women) express how it feels to be on the receiving end of racism?
You vent about a shitty day at work.
You vent about a car accident.
You vent about a friend's bad personal habits.
Expressing frustration, hurt, anger, and despair about your oppression is not venting.
Being frank about how it feels to live in a world where you don't count as a fully human being is not venting.
Telling people what you really think about some of the things they take for granted is not venting.
Pointing out the way some habits reinforce dynamics and attitudes that hurt a lot of fucking people is not venting.
As for a safe space for White people to be ignorant - that's the whole fucking world. Where is the safety for us? When do we get to just dip our toes in racism instead of having it knock us upside the head and remind us of our place in the world?
Must be nice to be White. Can you imagine? You can actually debate whether or not it's a good idea to walk up to somebody and put your hands in somebody's head and instead of people calling you out for being an uncouth jackass with no home training (and treating you as such), it's apparently that person's responsibility to educate you about the error of your ways.
Must be nice to be White. Must be nice to be given the benefit of the doubt every step of the way. Must be nice to have all those patient POCs ready to explain and educate at the drop of a hat - for free - no matter what it costs us personally. After all, what's most important is that we have a productive conversation, even though the only people really gaining anything from it are White people and often at our expense.
Must be mighty nice.
~RVCBard
{via}
You vent about a shitty day at work.
You vent about a car accident.
You vent about a friend's bad personal habits.
Expressing frustration, hurt, anger, and despair about your oppression is not venting.
Being frank about how it feels to live in a world where you don't count as a fully human being is not venting.
Telling people what you really think about some of the things they take for granted is not venting.
Pointing out the way some habits reinforce dynamics and attitudes that hurt a lot of fucking people is not venting.
As for a safe space for White people to be ignorant - that's the whole fucking world. Where is the safety for us? When do we get to just dip our toes in racism instead of having it knock us upside the head and remind us of our place in the world?
Must be nice to be White. Can you imagine? You can actually debate whether or not it's a good idea to walk up to somebody and put your hands in somebody's head and instead of people calling you out for being an uncouth jackass with no home training (and treating you as such), it's apparently that person's responsibility to educate you about the error of your ways.
Must be nice to be White. Must be nice to be given the benefit of the doubt every step of the way. Must be nice to have all those patient POCs ready to explain and educate at the drop of a hat - for free - no matter what it costs us personally. After all, what's most important is that we have a productive conversation, even though the only people really gaining anything from it are White people and often at our expense.
Must be mighty nice.
~RVCBard
{via}
What Pen Did You Use?
Sooo my younger sister is packin up her room, getting ready to go to college {SPELMAN!! WHOOP WHOOP}
& she's going through all her stuff, find things to throw out & such
& she comes across some old diaries of hers
& apparently I WROTE IN THEM
{in addition to her entries}
& LEFT COMMENTARY.
*blink*
LMAOOOOO wth!!!
On the bottom & in the margins you can find my 10 year old self asking questions like "ooo0 what pen did you use?"
HAAAAHAHAHAH
Why is this all I cared about when reading her diary?!? Why? Why did I leave notes?!?! WHO DOES THAT!?!?
*sigh* I slay me. Forever.
& she's going through all her stuff, find things to throw out & such
& she comes across some old diaries of hers
& apparently I WROTE IN THEM
{in addition to her entries}
& LEFT COMMENTARY.
*blink*
LMAOOOOO wth!!!
On the bottom & in the margins you can find my 10 year old self asking questions like "ooo0 what pen did you use?"
HAAAAHAHAHAH
Why is this all I cared about when reading her diary?!? Why? Why did I leave notes?!?! WHO DOES THAT!?!?
*sigh* I slay me. Forever.
I Confess...
I stole--borrowed this all from this girl's Tumblr: USayNappyLikeItsABadThing
I sowwy *insert cutest most irresistiblest puppy dog doe eyed sad face here*
But I just HAD to! They kept taunting me, insisting that I had to "have" them. They didn't believe I could see them, pass them, & NOT post them on this here blog.
And well. They were right.
So you see, it wasn't me! It was THEM!
*sigh*
Okay. There's my disclaimer for ya. Had to put that out there. Carrying on :)
Kayobi Clothing
(Fufu: Is a staple food of West and Central Africa. It is usually made from cassava, yams, and sometimes combined with cocoyam, plantains, or maize that is pounded and eaten with your delicious soup of choice.)
Blech. Like the shirt. I don't fancy fufu too much. Nor the soup. {Hold your stones} But it is better than war.
This reminds me of Morehouse. Every. Single. One.
lol too cute
#truf {truth}
I sowwy *insert cutest most irresistiblest puppy dog doe eyed sad face here*
But I just HAD to! They kept taunting me, insisting that I had to "have" them. They didn't believe I could see them, pass them, & NOT post them on this here blog.
And well. They were right.
So you see, it wasn't me! It was THEM!
*sigh*
Okay. There's my disclaimer for ya. Had to put that out there. Carrying on :)
Kayobi Clothing
(Fufu: Is a staple food of West and Central Africa. It is usually made from cassava, yams, and sometimes combined with cocoyam, plantains, or maize that is pounded and eaten with your delicious soup of choice.)
Blech. Like the shirt. I don't fancy fufu too much. Nor the soup. {Hold your stones} But it is better than war.
This reminds me of Morehouse. Every. Single. One.
lol too cute
#truf {truth}
How to Be Friends with an Introvert
1. If you must drag them to a party, please don’t abandon them.
Don’t go rushing off to catch up with your other friends without including the introvert; the inny will die in a corner.
2. If they actually call and want to talk, listen!
These moments may not come often, since Innies usually work out their problems within their own brains, but that does not mean they are all Bella Swan “suffer in silence” types.
3. Realize that they do want to be alone sometimes.
They may have gone to that party, and even enjoyed it, but they burn out faster than you and need time to recharge alone. The assumption that all introverts are shy really bugs me. This is not always the case. They can be charming, tell jokes, and generally be the life of the party…but for a limited time only.
4. Skip the small talk.
Introverts are reflective beings and enjoy conversations about feelings and debating things like the ontological argument, and whatever interests they have. They can only tolerate chitchat with people they just met or haven’t seen for awhile. If you must tell them your entire jam-packed weekend in detail, check your inny friend for signs of consciousness periodically.
5. Introverts don’t hate people.
They just find them tiring.
6. Introverts are socially aware.
Yes, we are well-versed in social nuances, customs, and mannerisms; we just don’t implement them as frequently as extroverts do.
{via}
SN: why does sparknotes have a blog o.O
Don't know what I'm talking about?
You would if you clicked the {via} link! >:O + :-P
Don’t go rushing off to catch up with your other friends without including the introvert; the inny will die in a corner.
2. If they actually call and want to talk, listen!
These moments may not come often, since Innies usually work out their problems within their own brains, but that does not mean they are all Bella Swan “suffer in silence” types.
3. Realize that they do want to be alone sometimes.
They may have gone to that party, and even enjoyed it, but they burn out faster than you and need time to recharge alone. The assumption that all introverts are shy really bugs me. This is not always the case. They can be charming, tell jokes, and generally be the life of the party…but for a limited time only.
4. Skip the small talk.
Introverts are reflective beings and enjoy conversations about feelings and debating things like the ontological argument, and whatever interests they have. They can only tolerate chitchat with people they just met or haven’t seen for awhile. If you must tell them your entire jam-packed weekend in detail, check your inny friend for signs of consciousness periodically.
5. Introverts don’t hate people.
They just find them tiring.
6. Introverts are socially aware.
Yes, we are well-versed in social nuances, customs, and mannerisms; we just don’t implement them as frequently as extroverts do.
{via}
SN: why does sparknotes have a blog o.O
Don't know what I'm talking about?
You would if you clicked the {via} link! >:O + :-P
From 'Round These Internets
The Champ gets about as soft as we'll ever see him in this post. Caution: reading it will probably having you feeling all nostalgic and verklempt and sh*t. Worry not, thug cards will promptly be reinstated upon completion & exition* of the post.
New iPhone app for the sneaker heads out there.
For the new college bitties: Tips for packing and some Do's & Don'ts
Free shipping at Forever21.com when you spend atleast $40 ($75 is the usual minimum to qualify). Code: STANDOUT {Move with haste. Offer ends 8/13}
This style makes me want to get Senegalese twists. Looong ones down to my butt. But where to get them done? :(
Jennifer Hudson contemplates hairstyle change. I'm all for it!
Gasp. Proof: Creative Intelligence is dropping.
This post reminded me...Football season is nigh, near, & basically here! :)
We fly high, no lie, you know thisss GIANTS!
Cool online find: The Mimi Magazine Blog
*totally made that word up. i likes it.
New iPhone app for the sneaker heads out there.
For the new college bitties: Tips for packing and some Do's & Don'ts
Free shipping at Forever21.com when you spend atleast $40 ($75 is the usual minimum to qualify). Code: STANDOUT {Move with haste. Offer ends 8/13}
This style makes me want to get Senegalese twists. Looong ones down to my butt. But where to get them done? :(
Jennifer Hudson contemplates hairstyle change. I'm all for it!
Gasp. Proof: Creative Intelligence is dropping.
This post reminded me...Football season is nigh, near, & basically here! :)
We fly high, no lie, you know thisss GIANTS!
Cool online find: The Mimi Magazine Blog
*totally made that word up. i likes it.
4.8.10
Sooo...
Yeah, the bantu knot out? FAIL!! I HATE it :(
THIS is the ratchetness that came out:
Just icky.
I don't even know where I went wrong?!
*sigh*
But it was the first time, right? I'll get it next time.
So yeah. I couldn't possibly go out like this.
Naturally, I resorted to my go-to puff.
Buuuut I'm pretty tired of it. So it was a no go.
I even tried the head wrap thing!
Buuuut that was a no go as well.
Finally I decided to just throw a hat on top.
It'll suffice.
Now Shanna & I {the miss in the pink} are off to Brooklyn! :)
{Excuse the sucky pic quality. Eye dee kay why it's so horrendous. To give you an idea of how bad it is, that head wrap? The one that looks purple? It's BLACK. -_-}
THIS is the ratchetness that came out:
Just icky.
I don't even know where I went wrong?!
*sigh*
But it was the first time, right? I'll get it next time.
So yeah. I couldn't possibly go out like this.
Naturally, I resorted to my go-to puff.
Buuuut I'm pretty tired of it. So it was a no go.
I even tried the head wrap thing!
Buuuut that was a no go as well.
Finally I decided to just throw a hat on top.
It'll suffice.
Now Shanna & I {the miss in the pink} are off to Brooklyn! :)
{Excuse the sucky pic quality. Eye dee kay why it's so horrendous. To give you an idea of how bad it is, that head wrap? The one that looks purple? It's BLACK. -_-}
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